I feel like crying or locking myself in, in a soundproof room right about now. Actually, I should have done that yesterday but just like today I cannot do that. Am not depressed or stressed, am just a tired working mother.
I don’t know what has happened at the office but there is no single day that we leave early. It makes no sense really that I always leave the office at say 6.00 or thereabouts to go home which is about an hour away. Don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining about that, it’s an observation. I know some of you probably stay at work till late in the night, because you have work to do, which makes a lot of sense. Now that’s the difference between you and me, I spend an extra hour or hours in the office doing almost nothing really. This is an issue am struggling to sort out with both my peers and my superiors.
So back to why I feel like shouting . The other night I didn’t sleep well, I was unwell. In fact my not so close friend insomnia passed by and I had to pick a book and read. Had a coughing bout and a blocked nose with no medication, an accidental this was. I finally dozed off at about 4.00 in the morning. No sooner had I closed my eyes did Sandbaby wake up to go to poop. Those of you who have a child or children know that this may well be followed by fetching drinking water or silly hunger pangs. Then we went to sleep. I swear I hadn’t even closed my eyes (that’s my story) when I heard my sister wake me up. I felt so cheated, like how? Kwani how many hours does a night have? I dragged myself and my daughter out of bed. Rushed through my routine like Lazy Mary from the nursery rhyme ,dragged from bed. I went to work grudgingly and I was actually worrying that I might doze off on duty.
Today being a Saturday, I had hoped to indulge myself and sneak an extra hour of sleep as compensation for last night and indeed I was on course. The weather at the coast is so conducive, very cold by our standards, at about 23-25°c. I was all cuddled in my bedding with my alarm on snooze mode. Until she woke me up. Yes, you guessed right. Sandbaby woke me up so she could go to the toilet. Then she brought her homework to bed so we could go through it. All this time am thinking, “I want to sleep. I need to sleep. Why can’t you sleep like other children?”
I wished somebody could tell this little girl that it was only Saturday and her homework was due Monday. Which means she can show it to mummy either Saturday night or any other time on Sunday but not this morning. I wished she could sleep in a bit late because days are coming when she will need to wake up at 4.00am in the morning. Of course it is adorable and even admirable that she wakes up thinking of her unfinished homework, but at 5.00am on Saturday? Lord have mercy on me and do send someone to talk to Sandbaby.