This is a collection of things my daughter tells me that I find ridiculous, funny, intelligent or just interesting. I do hope to capture the moments though I can not capture her expressions or emotions. Enjoy your reading .
Her: Mom, am scared of the teachers in our school.
Her: When they stare at me I get scared.
Me: Why do they stare at you?
Her: Because am cute. They like my chubby cheeks.
Her: In school I have polluted.
Her: My stomach is paining I pollute, is paining I pollute, is paining I pollute. Why?
Me: I don’t know
Her: If some people pollute they feel weak? (shake my head) strong? (nod my head)
We need to change the subject!!!!
Me : So why do you like doing things that upset me?
Her:Because….somebody in my mind is tell me, “make your mummy beat you” all the time. Even when am sleeping she tells me that.
Me: 🙆 Eti?
Her: Yes. An invisible person. Mum help me to stop her in my head.
Her: Today is P.E
Her: I don’t like P.E but .(Don’t mind the grammar,that’s how she talks)
Me:Why don’t you like P.E?You like playing.
Her: Yes we play but P.E I don’t like. I fall, I fall. Many times I fall.
Her: Do you know Joppa?
Me: Yes. The one in the Bible.
Her: Do you also know that Tabitha is Dorcas?
Me:Yes I do.
Her: But Joppa is not here it’s in the Bible you know.
Me: silent, deep thoughts on what’s coming next.
Her: You need to read the Bible so you can tell me the stories. New Stories not old stories.
Her:Do you know how to bake cake?
Her: Mom, you need to learn how to cook snacks. Even nani’s mum knows. Learn how to make samosas then, it’s easy.
Me: (tongue in cheek) Okay.
Her: Mom, you you need to exercise.
Me: Why? (Am already skinny duh!)
Her: So you can be strong like boys.
Me: But am already strong, I carry you to bed everyday.
Her: Not strong like that. Strong like boys so you can protect me.
These little beings can be very trying and getting the right response may prove to be tricky. It gets even more difficult if you are raising your child in a liberal way, where you hold conversations on everything. Oh how I wish I could go old school but hey if I did that they I wouldn’t have this collection.