Marriage. A beginning that starts with the end. Especially in fairy tales where the story always ends when the charming prince marries the enchanting beautiful princess. In real life, a couple receives a marriage certificate for a life they know nothing of nor have experience in.
They are therefore receiving a certificate into a new life, graduating from the old, and into a fresh start. Tying the knot, means cutting off some singly habits and dropping old friends.
This year seems to be a blessed year that has seen and is still seeing several people in my phone book start a new life. First it was my school mate, my boss in my crazy world, we call her CEO Nusrat, at FMI(Fulrat Mental Institute) at a non existent organization of course. After a long wait, the good Lord did shine His eyes upon her, and the time was right, she tied the knot to Mr. Lathief (not his real name). I haven’t met him but going but what he’s been able to achieve so far I like him already. This is exactly what marriage is supposed to do to a person, at least in my world. Mrs. Lathief has taken a long overdue sabbatical from social media where she would usually bombard us with 100 plus status updates and if you ignored her you would just be tagged randomly on a post.
I remember telling her sometimes back that this would surely come to pass. What I liked about it is her maturity at handling her marriage, she has managed to keep things under wraps. Keeping all of us in the dark, not knowing where they have gone for their honeymoon and all. I sure do pray that Allah does bless her marriage and as she observes her first Ramadhan fast in marriage may it bring nothing but joy.
Then they pulled the rug under my feet, and the skies darkened, a show of an imminent storm. Today I learnt that a dear friend got married, the other day, not in secret but silently. I was taken aback, but quickly took stock of reality. How many times have I wanted to somebody something and didn’t tell them until it was all over on social media? A wedding isn’t just anything, it takes your whole being to organize and arrange. At the same time your life doesn’t stop as you organise for it, you still have to go to work, pay your bills etc. So I guess it might skip your mind to share this important information with friends.
Today I am sad and happy at the same time. Like I said marriage is a beginning with an end. SandDaddy is married, like in a proper wedding and all and I just got to learn about it. It is a sad day for me because I have lost a friend, a confidant and my coparent to Sandbaby. He’s not Sandbaby’s real father and we have never dated but he’s been there for me from the time my daughter was born. There’s no milestone he hasn’t been aware of, no complications he didn’t get consulted on, my 911 at all times. I have lost him because I can’t monopolise him anymore, he belongs to his wife and I should respect that as a friend. I would expect that from him as well whether in marriage or just a serious relationship. It’s important to give each other space for the new relationship to thrive. I sort of understand now why Grace Msalame, yes the media personality, let her daughters be flower girls in her ex boyfriend’s wedding. It is unfortunate that SandDaddy did not think to at least inform a single soul at FMI denying us a chance to spoil him. We would have bullied the CEO to waylay one of the ships from Mexico to deliver maize for your wedding or better still I would have made sure she pays for your honeymoon at a place of your choice, by overdosing you on weed. At least I have put a smile on your face 😉 Losing a friend to marriage is totally worth it and acceptable.
I wish you nothing but the best in your new life and may your marriage be a blessing to you and your family. It is said that he who finds a wife finds a good thing and may it be so for you.
I know there are several weddings coming up, even in my absence know that I wish you the best always. And always acknowledge God and seek Him and all shall be well.
Cheers to weddings and a good life!!